COMMUNICATION THAT REALLY IMPROVES RELATIONSHIP

Communication is something we all know is necessary to keep any relationship strong and loving, and although we are aware of the importance of communication, we still seem to be clueless about what exactly good communication really is. This does not mean you are clueless as a person, but it does mean that more attention is required on your part, so that you can become more open and invite the many forms of communication that exist, so that you will be able to understand yourself and your partner much better. There is nothing that keeps a relationship healthy, better than understanding and once you start becoming more familiar with your communicating styles, as well as your partners, you will be able to work better as a team in making the best of your relationship.

The first step in achieving better communication that will really work, is to take a look at you first. People always tend to turn to their partner first when things are not running so smoothly in their relationship. They automatically start pointing out what their partner is doing or not doing, as well as how their partner is not listening to them. This may all be true depending on your particular situation, but it is important that you take the responsibility in reviewing your own actions and communication first, before you can point anything out in your partner. Remember, it is very easy to see other people’s mistakes, but when it comes to looking at you, it is much harder to accept criticism, even from yourself- because no one wants to be wrong. This is where you need to get real about things. Communication is not about who is right or wrong, but instead about helping each other see things from each other’s perspective, so that you can be on the page and avoid any misunderstanding that will cause unneeded arguments.

WHAT IS TRUE LOVE

What is true love? The true love is something that everyone wants to feel, but it is a fact that only a little part of the people has the luck to meet her. What is actually the true love? That is the most beautiful thing that can happen to someone, because that is one shared feeling. When you meet someone and fall in love with him that is not the true love still. If this person shares your feelings that still is not the true love.

But it is true that this is the first step to that amazing feeling. The true love is something more then falling in love. She is at the first place trust, because without him every relationship is fated and can’t survive a long time. When you have trust in your partner you are anxiety-free. That must be shared because when the one person in the relationship believes in the other, but the other don’t do this, this leads to problems and probably to broke up. The true love is a friendship. You must to can be not only lover to your partner, you must be his friend.

Your partner must be the man from who you can ask for advice and who you can say your secrets, because he will not say to no one else this things, he wouldn’t be betrayed you. It is a true love when you can talk about everything with the person who you are in love with. Exactly the talking is the most important thing for the true love, because when the partners talk, they can find a decision to every problem, which they have. One big part of the couples breaking up, because they can’t or don’t want to talk. When the love is a true love, she can survive everything. Every problem is a test for the feelings and strength of one relationship. The true love is help. When you really love someone you are ready to help him right away and to do everything for him.

Of course this must be shared. The true love is care, because when you are in love with someone you make everything that your partner can feel fine and loved. When the love is a true love this fact automatically eliminates the egoism, because now you are not alone and you must thing about the wishes, which have the person with who you are. When you love someone you want to make him happy. The true love means support too. The feeling when you know that by you stands someone who loves you and every time will support you, is really great. One love is true when the two in the relationship are frank and honest.

The true love is aspiration for acquaintance of the man who you are in love with. When you became well familiarize with your partner, you will find his entire blemish, but you must not aspire to remove them. If your partner’s love to you is real he will make everything possible to remove them himself. When two people can make so that their character fit and when they can make compromises that mean that these people love each other and their love is a true love. To find the true love means to find a perfect match for you, your half. The people are saying that everyone has a half somewhere over the world, but these who meet her are only a little part.

When the love is shared, she is a true love and makes you one better person and the world look like a better place for a living. When you and your partner have the same thinking and the same conception for the life, you can be together a very long time. The true love is when two people want to spend their time together in loving each other and when their love survives all of the obstacles, which they meet during their life together. Furthermore, if the people are able to keep their love the same as it was in the beginning through out the years, you can say that this is true love. Remember that finding the true love of your life is really hard and you may need more than one lifetime to make that happen, but in the end it will be worth it. Make sure that you will never stop searching for the true love, because there is no set date that you will find it and also the true love is likely to appear in odd circumstances.

SURVIVING LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP

Challenging and difficult, though they may not be what we want to hear, are the words that best describe long distance relationships. Keep in mind however, that the words are challenging and difficult, not impossible. Many people choose to give a long distance relationship a try, with the constant curiosity if it was the right decision to make and if it even stands a chance. The truth is, a long distance relationship has just as much a chance of succeeding as any other relationship!

Long Distance Relationships share the same facts as an average relationship. It involves two people who share an interest in each other’s lives, care for one another and of course have a love for each other that they hope will only continue to grow. On the other hand, a long distance relationship does have its differences as well. It takes away your ability to see each other on a frequent note, as well as the choice of being intimate whenever you desire, not to mention that there would be major trust required. Being unable to spend time together in a physical presence makes it harder to hang on to, but does not spell out doom for your relationship.

The first step is to make an agreement of what your expectations are in the relationship and how much of a commitment you are willing to give and receive. If the two of you decide to be monogamous, then it is clear that neither of you will be dating anyone else as long as your romantic relationship exists. Being clear about what you both want is extremely important, especially in a long distance relationship, in order to prevent future misunderstandings and mistakes. Do not feel afraid to tell your partner what you really need and want from him or her, you deserve the chance to speak from your heart and he or she deserves to know the truth and judge whether they can give it to you.

Trust is a major necessity if you wish to have your relationship from a distance. Without trust and honesty, the relationship is in for danger and unsuccessfulness, just as it would be any other relationship. By accepting the challenge of a long distance relationship, you also accepted the fact that you will have to have the trust and faith that your partner will not be seeing anyone else as promised. Being paranoid and accusing will only grow doubts, insecurity and tension between you and none of those three will help the relationship survive successfully.

How To Get The Chemistry In Your Relationship Back

Most relationships start out in a way that its like there’s fireworks everytime the two people are together. Both of you just cant get enough of each other, you enjoy the times you spend together and cant wait to do it again. There is some kind of chemistry developing between the two of you that just seems to bind and fuse the two of you together the more you spend more time with each other. Sparks just seem to fly when you get together and more and more people tend to notice the chemistry between the two of you.

Everybody tends to say that a two person have chemistry when they are fit for each other. Its more than just a cliché since chemistry cant really be described, its just the way two persons seem to just click. You know you have chemistry with another person when your knees start shaking everytime you are near her, you begin to stammer, your stomach feels like a haven for butterflies and you get all sweaty all the time. Chemistry could be another word for love but in some cases, the chemistry might be gone but love could still be present. That’s why some people would like to revive the chemistry in their relationship because they still love the person and would like to make the relationship better; like that way it used to be when they fell in love with one another.

The rush one gets when they are in love, it’s like having a triple shot of espresso. It’s like your always high and on top of the world. Your heart is racing everytime your near your partner and you develop powerful feelings that are just constantly nagging for attention, you cant explain what it is, but its there. But after a certain period of time, some relationships get past the chemistry and the momentum wanes, you have gone past the “honeymoon period.” Many have strived to get their chemistry back; here are some tips on how to get your chemistry back.

Chemistry can either be through physical and emotional. Physical chemistry deals with the way we are attracted to our parents on the physical level. In some relationships, the partners tend to be too relaxed and comfortable with their relationship that they have a tendency to let go of their physical looks. When this happens, one partner may lose their physical attraction and their physical chemistry as well. Some cases have shown that physical chemistry may also be about the great sex they have, when this type of physical chemistry is forgotten and the sex becomes too regular and boring, the physical chemistry may be lost. Loss of attention to the physical attributes and to the physical contact is what causes these problems, try to get yourself back in shape and try to look good for your partner, this will show that you don’t take your partner for granted and you still want to look good for them. In regards to sex, try to be adventurous, think up of ways which can spicen up your sexual activities to make them more exciting and adventurous for both of you. This will rekindle the physical chemistry that has decreased over the years.

With emotional chemistry, this could be because we have grown tired with our partner because of the routine becoming too routinely. Refresh your emotional chemistry for each other by taking in a new perspective about each other. Take vacations, act out your fantasies, be open to one another and find a solution on how to bring the sparks back to each other. Try to discover what the both of you want out of the relationship and build on that. Be open to new ideas and never contradict. The less fight the better it is to strengthen the ties that bind you together. If you truly love one another, you will find out and everything in how to get the chemistry back in your relationship.

Girlfriends & Wives – Why Men View Them Differently

A friend of mine announced his plans to get married recently. It came as somewhat of a surprise considering that he once vowed to never get married. We talked about the reasons and the motivations for his about-face, and in doing so, embarked upon an ongoing dialogue in which we weighed the pros and cons of having a girlfriend, versus the pros and cons of having a wife. It was the kind of revealing conversation that women aren’t usually privy to…until now.

Since the foundation of marriage is commitment, it’s only appropriate that I start there. My friend is not commitment aversive. In fact, he has tried – and failed – in previous attempts to have committed relationships. But so have most men. During our conversation he expressed his fear of failing in a marriage. This fear is not the same as failing in a casual, or short-term relationship where there’s no cohabitation or commitment. It’s a deeper, greater fear of failure. The kind that everyone (friends, families, co-workers, distant relatives, and anyone else you may invite to your wedding) will know about.

When men fail in relationships with their girlfriends, they can, in many instances, salvage their friendships with them. When men fail in their marriages, they rarely remain friends with their ex-wives. The continued exposure is a painful reminder of what once was, and will never be. Any friendship that existed is soon replaced by contempt and resentment. Not exactly the ingredients for friendship.

Men like having girlfriends. Women acquire this position in different ways. Sometimes starting out as acquaintances, co-workers, or friends. Sometimes they are officially given the title of girlfriend, other times they “assume” the position based on their interactions and emotional connections with men. No woman could ever assume the position of being a wife. Wives are always chosen by the man. It’s akin to the way that a woman always chooses her lovers. This is the balance of power between the sexes.

Girlfriends (the assumed ones) eventually want an official acknowledgment over a period of time. And just so you women know, if a guy does not officially offer you the position and title of his “girlfriend,” it’s because he does not want to commit to you…but he does want to continue receiving the unofficial benefits of being your friend.

A recent study revealed that two-thirds of college students have been in a “friends with benefits” relationship, citing the lack of commitment required as the main advantage to such an arrangement. More than half of those who had sex with a friend said they had engaged in all forms of sex; 22.7 percent said they had intercourse only, while 8 percent said they did everything but have intercourse.

My friend is not a college student, but he was in this situation. It led to him receiving an ultimatum. His assumed girlfriend threatened to cut off his “benefits.” As a result she got a promotion from assumed girlfriend, to fiance in just one night. With this decision, he was forced to confront his greatest fear; the greatest fear of all men.

Choosing the wrong woman as a wife.

Women have similar fears, but because they tend to be fantasy-driven, they turn their focus to their “big day” after such a monumental decision. It distracts them from the possibility of making a big mistake. The women who are less emotionally distracted seem to manage and rationalize their fears much better; at least better than men do.

Men are more fearful of choosing the wrong woman to commit to, than they are of commitment itself. Yes, men fear being “locked” down – legally or logistically – when the woman that they really want finally comes along. The logic among men is simple: it’s hard to find the love of your life when you are already married.

When men aren’t ready to settle down with a long-term girlfriend, it’s always because they don’t have confidence in their choice of girlfriend as a potential wife. After all, with the assumed girlfriend, men can always say, “I never said you were my girlfriend.” With the official girlfriend, you just break-up, even though it may be painful for her or you. And ending things with your wife? That’s drama – and expensive.

A girlfriend becomes a low-risk proposition in contrast. But choosing not to get married for fear of it “not working out,” is like choosing not to play your favorite sport for fear of getting hurt: the risk is always present. My friend took this attitude, and with it, decided to take his once assumed girlfriend, as his new wife.

During our conversations about girlfriends and wives, I was reminded that for men, there is a stigma associated with marriage that many women are not aware of: men fear that sex changes both in quality and frequency during marriage. Men also fear that their wives won’t pay as much attention to their appearance as they did when they were once a girlfriend.

While these may seem like trivial fears to most women, they are real and very substantial ones for men. So much so, that they immobilize men in their efforts to move forward with a decision to “settle down.” For men, being “stuck” with a woman who loses her “hotness” – sexually or visually – makes them feel like they have indeed, settled, which is an unsettling realization. Men are visual, sexual creatures. Girlfriends don’t have to be reminded of that. Men also fear that wives may change in terms of attitude, demeanor, and values over time; causing them to fall out of love.

These are all fears. Some are legitimate. Some are not. All are to be evaluated on a case-by-case basis. I wish my friend well. He is my best friend after all, and you can’t help but have guarded optimism when someone you love makes one of the most important decisions of their lives. Hopefully this article, inspired by his sudden marriage, will help other men realize that the difference between a girlfriend and a wife, comes down to perception.

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